So this is what it feels like, when you feel infinite.
I probably should have already gone north today to the university I was going to after the weekends, but I did not, because it was a holiday. It would only take me two and a half hours for me to get there, anyway so I decided I’d go there tomorrow, albeit my classes starts at 7 o’clock in the morning. I am fond of it. Really.
So, holiday – I spent most of my time today in front of my computer doing nothing, I guess, to mislay the boredom I was feeling. My usual routine – check my Facebook; check my mails; check some tweets of some anonymous people, friends, and artists I follow in Twitter; watch and listen to some music videos in Youtube; read blogs – clichéd my everyday life since summer. And by the way I was reading a book, The Summer of No Regrets, and I wonder how I found myself reading such. It was a love story, and I cannot and do not want to call myself a fan. It was also about lies and the likes about love for which in the book’s cover says: “What happens if you fall in love with a lie?” But anyway, it has nothing to do with this, so I might as well drop it.
As the hands of the time still round the clock, the day was becoming a pain in my arse. It’s a good thing the weather was great – wasn’t humid, wasn’t sultry, just great – because I was planning to take steps outside. I do it a lot when I feel lonely. But it’s not that I am feeling lonely today, I just feel like it. So I took a bath and looked for some clothes to wear in my drawer, and found a discolored red shirt, almost worn out, and a short short. I remembered I have already brought most of my clothes in my dormitory, and all that’s left were those I don’t usually wear because I kind of feel like out-dated when I wear them. But I did not have any choice but to wear them; I only planned to walk not beyond the subdivision we live in, anyway – but to my surprise, I found myself riding a tricycle going to the poblacion (a Spanish word which means “a town inside a town” said my History Professor). I cracked a smile and thought: it’s really nice to apply things you’ve learned from your Professors.
The sun was already setting when I was disembarking from the tricycle, and honestly, I have always admired the horizons, and the colors of the sky, and how the rays of the sun strike through the densities of the clouds. The sun setting, and before long the stars would appear and shine above us.
“How valuable are the stars to you?”
I don’t know, but it was a moment when I realized I was with my friends, and took me another moment to hear what he was asking; then, another moment for me to grasp it. He was asking how important the stars are to me, and I couldn’t find an answer. It was nothing the same as answering a hard and objective question in a lecture or even in a recitation class where you and your nerves aren’t just in a good term, and all eyes set on you – tonight it was just my friends and a stupid question; nothing more, nothing less.
“I don’t know.” I always say that, ending the conversation. But the real thing about friends is that you both never get out of things to tell and talk about, it would just go randomly off of your mouth, and boom! Another conversation has started. We did that over and over across the deepening night, not minding its profundity and the fact that I have classes tomorrow and needed to wake up at 2 o’clock predawn to travel miles from my hometown to my school. Well, whatever, we were still enjoying the night while playing Uno cards and talking about all the random stuff that had happened along with our lives since we all parted and followed the careers we chose and we wanted. Funny, how I smiled to myself and thinking, missing the fun and all during high school days, but now it’s over. Anon, this moment would be over, too.
Come 11 o’clock in the evening, we decided to take the roads to go home. Still, all the random stuff surround us as we walk, and this friend of mine who had asked me about the stars was bragging his blog. We were already turning to a street where in the end we will all part ways and I remembered a quote to myself: “When I walk alone, I want to reach the end, but when I walk along with a friend, I hope it would never end.” But all good things must end, and the better thing is I have felt one of the best feelings I have ever felt – when my friends and I part ways but still wear a smile on my face thinking maybe when this could happen again, and not worrying because I believe we were certain about one same thing: that we will see each other again soon, and again, feel infinite.